


I brought you coffee- a Naegami fic (English)

by mtolympia



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Dangan Ronpa: Trigger Happy Havoc
Genre: Fluff, M/M, Modern AU, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Trans Naegi Makoto, also a disaster gay, byakuya is a repressed gay, naegami fluff, no killing game au, secretary and boss type of dynamic, this is the first time I post here PLEASE BE NICE
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-25
Updated: 2020-07-04
Packaged: 2021-03-02 05:28:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 13,208
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23839867
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mtolympia/pseuds/mtolympia
Summary: Set in a world where the killing game never happened, Byakuya is the CEO of one of his family's companies and needs a new secretary. Makoto is the perfect person to fill that role, becoming more important to Byakuya than what the heir ever thought he would be. Will a perfectly-timed business trip will be what helps them sort their feelings out, or rather ruin everything they had been able to build?
Relationships: Naegi Makoto/Togami Byakuya
Comments: 23
Kudos: 283





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> Hey! This is my first time posting here, I'm getting the hang of it. Anyways, I haven't written a longer work in years and I really hope this isn't too bad. Quarantine really got to me it seems-  
> Anyway, this is also my first time writing these characters. I did my absolute best, I hope it'll be a fun read for you all!

Being twenty-one years old and already being one of the most important members of the Togami empire, while also being the youngest son, isn’t easy. Byakuya is completely aware of that fact. He himself has fought harshly, continuously competing with his step-siblings and working hard ever since he was very young to get where he was now. He knew how much work was needed to reach his status; that was why he couldn’t stand those who assumed that what he had earned had been handed to him on a silver platter, just like any common spoilt kid meddling with daddy’s money. He knew about the fights, the frustrated tears he had spilt, the hours of studying and work he had gone through to reach his current position. To be in charge of one of the most important companies of his family’s empire he had worked hard and diligently; he knew he deserved it and he was ready to bring honour to his family.  
It hadn’t been that long since he started working in that company, but he had already lost his secretary, who he had to fire due to neglecting her tasks and not taking her job seriously. She was always late, taking breaks whenever she wanted and for however long she pleased and when she did work, she didn’t even do it properly. Clearly, she had been lured in by the salary, slightly higher than the average secretary pay in other places, but she wasn’t as qualified as she wanted to let you believe. Byakuya had started looking for a replacement right away and to his surprise, it had been his best friend Touko to find someone.  
«I know this guy- I mean, more or less, I- anyway, he’s my friend’s older brother, he’s a hardworking guy and is pretty good at speaking other languages, maybe he could send you his CV. Think about it!»  
He had read the CV and was surprised that, despite them being the same age, Makoto Naegi seemed perfectly qualified and the kind of person he was looking for. He had great references and his old bosses all said great things about him; he had all the competences needed for the job and was good at communicating with others. Eventually, Byakuya decided to give the boy a chance, hiring him after a successful interview where Naegi really showed that he could be the person the heir was looking for.   
Having found a new secretary that could help him stay up to date with meetings and other important matters really had put him at ease again. What he didn’t expect was what would follow.


	2. One

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Weird how a seemingly insignificant little thing can become such a big part of your life, huh?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is deadass where the name of the fic comes from. Also because I have 0 creativity when it comes to titles.  
> Byakuya learns to make friends.

«Naegi, what’s that cup on my desk?»  
The brunette turned around, taking his eyes off of the computer he was working with so that he could look his superior in the face.  
«Oh, that? I asked Touko what your usual order at the coffee shop is. Since I stopped there to have breakfast I thought it would have been nice to bring you a cup, since I don’t know if you have breakfast everyday. Also I thought you might get thirsty while working.»  
Makoto’s calmness in saying that threw Byakuya off. He was usually good at understanding people and foreseeing their moves or in understanding what they wanted from him. This time was different. First off, he would have never expected this kind of gesture from anyone except, maybe, Touko; but never from an acquaintance or even an employee. On top of that, from the boy’s tone of voice and behaviour it really seemed that Makoto had done that without any malice or expecting anything in return from the heir. And that wasn’t the last time that the brunette did something like that for Byakuya. Every day, when the heir got to his office he’d find a cup of hot coffee on his desk waiting for him and Makoto ready to greet him with a smile. The brunette was always on time, getting there a bit earlier than Byakuya and was always focused on what he worked on. Sometimes he was very clumsy (more than once huge stacks of documents had fallen off of his desk, things he was supposed to be working on; nothing that couldn’t be solved in a few minutes though) but he never screwed up the truly important things and was always able to fix everything without further issues. Makoto had become part of Byakuya’s routine and, as weird as it was for the heir to think that, he enjoyed having him around. By then he expected to find Makoto already there, waiting for him first thing in the morning, writing the umpteenth email or answering one of the numerous calls he would take care of every day. If he wasn’t busy doing those things he would raise his gaze and greet Byakuya with a small smile or he’d wave his hand. Byakuya would always answer nodding his head a bit or waving, before locking himself in his office, with his hot cup of coffee waiting for him.  
The only time Makoto didn’t show up at work (two consecutive days in which he was stuck at home with the flu) Byakuya truly realised the impact that guy had on his life. During those two days he personally went to the coffee shop to get his cup, by now something he couldn’t give up and part of his morning routine, eventually opting to have a decent breakfast too (something he never did on work days). «Oh, Mr. Togami, it’s been a while since I last saw you! Nowadays I always see your friend Makoto come in here for you…he’s such a nice guy, I’m so happy you have a person like that around. Do you know why he didn’t come today? Does he have a day off?»  
Byakuya’s answer were short and sharp, nothing unusual for those who knew him and had got used to his cold behaviour; but he thought about what the barista had said for a long time. Makoto wasn’t his friend, he was his employee. But it was true that the boy somewhat “took care” of Byakuya in a way. Bringing him coffee every morning wasn’t one of the tasks he had been hired for, but he still did it without expecting anything. Makoto had often tried to start a conversation, especially during the little bits of free time where they’d casually meet (after their lunch break or after work, while they were both waiting for their ride home, one waiting for a taxi and the other for his sister to pick him up; or again those little moments when Byakuya would come out of his office to go to the bathroom or go get some water and walk a bit after sitting for hours); the brunette would always look for topics and stuff they could talk about.  
During those two days where Makoto wasn’t there, Byakuya had to admit that he missed having the boy around. His presence definitely made a difference and, when he finally came back, he begun appreciating him even more. 

«What do you think of the company’s canteen?» Byakuya’s question came out of the blue, but he actually had a reason behind it. He had a plan in mind.  
«Well… actually I feel a bit out of place most of the time…I know that coming from me it must sound funny, considering the kind of person I am, but I have a hard time feeling part of the “group”.» He tried to lighten up his speech by smiling, even if it was clear it was a bit upsetting for him. Despite his optimistic and sociable nature, he wasn’t able to socialise with the other employees, who all had their friends and had something in common with each other. Makoto was a secretary, Byakuya’s secretary, there wasn’t anyone else that had a position like his own. Even if he had found a couple people he could talk with, he still felt completely out of place.  
Very well. Byakuya wasn’t happy about the other’s unease, he actually felt bad for him, but this situation was making it easier for him (at least that’s what he thought) to ask the question he had been planning.  
«I understand. Then, instead of making you go to the canteen every day, where you’d be uncomfortable, would it be okay if I invited you out for lunch with me every once in a while?»  
Makoto’s eyes widened as he looked at him; he never would have expected such question from his boss.  
«Are you really sure, sir?»  
«If I’m asking you this it means I would be happy to have you with me. Besides, I would also get the chance to thank you for all those coffees you always leave on my desk.»  
«There's no need to thank me for that, really! But…I’d e happy to have lunch with you, it would be nice.»  
"Perfect."  
Truth be told, after speaking with his friend Touko, Byakuya had been pushed by the girl to try and pursue a friendship with Makoto. The writer had admitted that another reason why she had suggested the brunette as a possible secretary was because she had seen the potential good influence Makoto’s personality could have on her friend. He needed someone who could lighten up his days throughout the week and Touko hoped that Byakuya could make more friends, since she couldn’t always be there for him and he could have used more people around. At first, the heir had been reluctant, mostly out of embarrassment and thinking it was silly, but he eventually accepted to try stepping out of his comfort zone; part of him secretly thinking that, maybe, making friends with the boy wouldn’t have been that bad. Trough his life he had never made that many deep connections and, most of the time, he didn’t understand what was the importance of relationships of that kind, seeing them as a waste of time that would have slowed him down and prevented him from reaching his goals. But Makoto was like a little magnet towards whom Byakuya felt drawn in. He was curious to get to know the boy more. In this case, trying to make friends with him wouldn’t have taken away precious time from his job, considering they worked in the same place. So, why not try it out?


	3. Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Byakuya's plan to take out Makoto for lunch turns out to be a success and the Heir finally learns how to socialize.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, I'm here with the new chapter! This was fun to write, I just hope I didn't make Makoto too ooc with the texting thing...I just kinda thought it would fit him and would be cute.

Byakuya always went to the same restaurant for lunch, every day. Most of the time he went there alone, sometimes he’d take Touko with him, others he’d go there with his relatives when they came to the city to check how he was taking care of the company. The place wasn’t too far from where he worked, about a fifteen minute car drive; it was quite calm and not too extravagant (unlike what people expected from Byakuya). Here the heir felt like he could breathe a little, leaving his worries out of the door. The owners of the place considered him part of the family and always reserved him his usual table, he didn’t even need to ask anymore.

«So you always come here for lunch? I don’t blame you, it’s such a nice place…» Makoto looked around, examining the furniture,the perfectly ironed table cloths, and the neatly placed, shiny cutlery.   
«What’s your favourite dish? I want to follow your advice.» Makoto was the one to carry out the conversation, considering Byakuya wasn’t used to do that in a out-of-the-job context. The same would happen when he hung out with Touko; she would be the one to talk while he would listen quietly, nodding and speaking only when necessary, showing that he was indeed paying attention to the conversation, he just didn’t have much to add. It was his way to converse. It might have been considered a bit cold by others, but it was Byakuya’s way to socialise, he grew up like that. He wasn’t the best when it came to trivial and “lighter” topics, he focused more on “serious” things, on his job. After all, it was his world, his habitat. 

«I think you’d like the salmon. It’s fresh, with a side of stir-fried green beans with soy sauce and baked potatoes. It’s excellent, really.»  
«I trust your judgement, it seems delicious.» His answer came along with a smile. Byakuya still had a hard time understanding how the boy always seemed to have the energy to be nice and polite. Perhaps, that would be the occasion to find out.

«You can be informal with me. Just saying.» Perhaps it wasn’t the best way to break the embarrassing silence that had fallen between the two, but it was better than nothing. Plus it had been something bothering Byakuya for a while now, he wanted to get it out.   
«Well…if you say so, then I’ll obey.» Makoto’s tone of voice was playful and light.  
«Can I…ask you to tell me a bit about yourself?-he continued- I mean, this isn’t a “business” occasion after all, we’re not here to talk about work related issues…right?»  
«No, no, you’re right. But I don’t know what you’d like to know about me.»  
Makoto seemed to think about it for a bit. «Tell me about what you like to do outside of work. I’m sure you must have some hobbies, right?»  
It was in that moment that Byakuya realised that no, he didn’t have any hobbies. When he’d get home after work or didn’t have anything important to do he would watch tv, most of the time listening to Touko’s suggestions and trying out whatever Netflix series she had brought up; otherwise he’d spend his time reading, or answering e-mails. It wasn’t anything interesting actually, Makoto would have probably thought he was boring. Even then, Byakuya started describing his pastime activities, hoping there was something in common with what the brunette liked to do. And lucky for him that was the case: Makoto too liked watching tv series. 

They started talking about the ones they both had seen, exchanging their various opinions on the topic. From tv series they moved onto movies, then books and to music for a bit too (this was the topic that Byakuya knew less about, but it made them even, considering Makoto didn’t know much about books). The heir was surprised to see how quickly time flew by while talking to his secretary; but that wasn’t an unpleasant surprise. He had to admit that inviting the brunette out for lunch had actually been a really good idea. He…had fun. Perhaps for the first time in a long while.

«I really want to thank you for inviting me, I was happy to have lunch with you. It was a nice change from my usual awkward meal at the canteen.» Before parting ways and each going back to their own desk, they stopped in front of Byakuya’s office door to chat.  
«I was happy too, I’m glad you accepted my invitation. If you’re up to it, I’d love to do it again, whenever you want.»

They did it again, actually more than once. Byakuya (who used to go to work without having strong feelings towards anything, content with the idea of going through another day made up by work, lunch, work, going back home, dinner and going to sleep) now got up in the morning thinking with a certain cheerfulness that going to work meant seeing Makoto, with whom he would have gone to lunch and with whom he would have talked about the last tv series or movie they had decided to watch simultaneously. As time went on they decided to exchange phone numbers (actually, Byakuya already had Makoto’s, since it was the boy’s only contact, while the heir had finally given the brunette his personal mobile number, rather than his work one) so that they could update each other regarding the latest events in the series exactly as they were happening on the screen.  
Byakuya had to get used to Makoto’s way to chat informally through messages. He used numerous emojis to emphasise what he felt as he typed.

[Talking about Stranger Things, while still watching the second season] I hate Billy! I hope karma will come back to give him what he deserves! (｀Д´)  
[Still talking about Stranger Things, but while watching the third season] Oh no this is not what I meant （；・д・）  
[Watching Umbrella Academy] I DIDN’T KNOW THAT SAYING “POPPING THE CHERRY” WAS A THING (・о・)  
The list could go on. Makoto’s messages were one of the very few things that could make Byakuya smile. He had got to the point where he was hoping that the notifications he received were all messages from the brunette and, sometimes, he felt a bit upset when that wasn’t the case. One day Byakuya catches himself smiling at a notification and started wondering why he had started behaving that way. After all, he cared about Touko too, but he never felt so…strongly when it came to her. Maybe he needed to talk to her about all this. After all she was a writer, she knew a fair amount about feelings. She was much more informed about these things, compared to him.


	4. Three

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Byakuya asks his trusted therapist for help: his best friend Touko. Will he be able to accept her diagnosis?

«Wait, start from the beginning again. Why do you need my help?»

«I need you to analyse my feelings and understand what Makoto is doing to me. I think I’m starting to consider him as a friend, a really good friend actually.» Byakuya was completely serious. It was a Saturday afternoon and he and Touko had met up at their favourite café; the heir sitting in front of a cup of green tea and matcha cookies and the writer in front of a cup of rose flavoured tea and a slice of strawberry shortcake. 

«You’re asking me to be your therapist? Because of Makoto?» Touko kept staring at Byakuya, who only nodded in response, taking a sip of his tea. The girl sighed, leaning back against her chair and crossing her arms. «First of all you’ll need to explain exactly what you…feel and when you feel it and, most of all, what you think about Makoto. And be honest about it. I know it’s hard for you and I know you have a hard time dealing with your feelings, but I need you to make an effort, otherwise I won’t be able to help.»

Byakuya knew Touko was right, but he wasn’t sure where he should have started. Slowly, he began to open up, explaining how he and Makoto had become close, how they had started talking outside of their job too, texting and sharing their interest in tv series. He went on to explain, although with a bit of difficulty, what he felt when he was around Naegi or when he received his messages. Or, again, when he received “goodnight” messages, or a “goodmorning” on Sundays when they weren’t at work. 

He also talked about how amusing and endearing the way Makoto used emojis in his messages, reflecting his real-life expressivity (after admitting that, he threatened Touko, making her promise to keep everything for herself) even though he thought it was a shame how they couldn’t mimic the way the boy’s freckles seemed to laugh along wth him. When the heir finished speaking, he leaned back in his chair with his arms crossed, pointing his gaze towards Touko, who was looking at her own cup with a concentrated look on her face while biting the nail on her right thumb; a habit that always came out when she was nervous or deeply immersed into her thoughts. 

«Have you ever thought that, maybe… you don’t see him just as a friend?» Touko spoke up, daring to expose her theory to Byakuya as she raised her eyes to look at him. He stared back at her, confused. 

«Elaborate, please. What are you insinuating?» Byakuya could see that the girl was trying to hold back a smile; clearly she was plotting something.

«I mean…well, I have no say in what you truly feel, that’s something only you can fully understand, but maybe… you have a crush on Makoto?»

Byakuya wasn’t expecting that kind of statement. «Me? A crush on Makoto?» He was completely dumbfounded.

«Would that be so weird?»

«First of all, I’m not a schoolboy anymore. And before you can start your speech about how crushes aren’t just a schoolboy’s thing: I know. But I don’t…have a crush.» He wanted to show confidence in what he was saying, but he faltered towards the end of the sentence.

«Alright, tell me why you’re not in love.» Touko encouraged him, trying to understand her friend’s motivations, despite knowing him far too well and knowing he was trying to lie to himself.

Byakuya had to think about it. He started thinking about what it meant to be in love: clichés like feeling butterflies in your stomach and constantly being in a good mood and feeling like the world was great and wonderful. That’s how people often described “being in love” to him. But Byakuya didn’t feel butterflies in his stomach, nor did he see the world in a better light. When he was around Makoto he felt calm, he didn’t feel judged and he never felt like he had to meet high standards in the way he behaved. He didn’t feel like he was going to die when he was away from the other boy, but he somewhat missed him, reason why his messages always improved his mood. His favourite moments through the day had become their lunches out together and every evening, when, after having dinner, they would both throw themselves onto the couch in their respective homes, simultaneously watching the same episodes, knowing that despite the distance they were connected by that little thing. 

Byakuya loved the sense of stability and familiarity that Makoto gave off and, despite the boy’s clumsiness was one of his flaws, it wasn’t a clumsiness that the heir saw coming from stupidity (which he would have found quite irritating), but rather derived from the fact that Makoto was a way too good and hardworking person, focused on doing his job, a bit too much sometimes. In Byakuya’s eyes, the way the secretary always found the energy to smile and the fact he was tenacious, always pushing through the hardest days, made him a person worthy of respect. He was the only kind of person with whom Byakuya felt like he could have a good connection. He was the only kind of person with whom Byakuya could have ever accepted a…relationship.

The realisation froze the heir, who felt unsettled by his own feelings. 

«I think you found the answer within yourself.» Touko broke the silence, stifling a giggle and looking at her friend with a sly smile.

«Shut up, don’t you dare comment further.» His words were sharp, but it was an attempt to distract her from noticing the involuntary blush creeping onto his cheeks. The idea of being in love “like a schoolboy” embarrassed him. He was an adult man, it wasn’t the time to act like a young boy and chasing after his own secretary. But Touko didn’t leave him alone, teasing him and drowning him in suggestions for his love life, inspired by the various books and fan fictions she had read, reassuring him that they would have absolutely worked on Makoto. 

Byakuya listened to her in silence, knowing that he probably wouldn’t have paid attention to the sickeningly sweet ideas his friend exposed, despite being grateful for how hard she was trying to help him. The things she was suggesting weren’t in his style, they would have felt forced; he would have found on his own a way to make a move towards Makoto. He needed to investigate first. He needed to understand if the boy felt a similar way towards him. That would have definitely been tricky. Byakuya had no idea what a good excuse to spend more time with him would be.


	5. Four

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Togami discovers what anxiety is

The excuse came pretty fast, as a few days long business trip, an important meeting with other CEOs of the companies linked to the Togami enterprises. Byakuya decided to take Makoto with him with an excuse; it was the perfect chance to get closer.

«Do you really want me to come with you?»

«Yes. I never travel alone, and having you with me would be helpful. You’re my secretary after all, you’re the one who receives most e-mails and you know I like being updated in real time about any news. You can also see it as a break from the usual routine. You’ll accompany me to the meetings, so that you can back me up in case I forget any important details during the discussions.» It was an half-truth. It was true that having Makoto with him would help him during the meetings, there to give him the data to back up his statements; but at the same time Byakuya had already gone to other business trips, always on his own. He had always travelled alone and he had always brought honour to his company. For the most part, this was just a big excuse to convince Makoto to go with him.

«Alright, I’d be happy to come, it seems cool.» Makoto replied with a smile, as usual, starting to book flight and hotel right away. 

«Two single bedrooms, right?» Byakuya thought about it. Yes, sharing a bedroom would have beenimproper, it was best to each have their own room. He nodded and in no time, Makoto had taken care of the whole trip. 

They left three days later. They were to meet at the airport at 8 in the morning, to go get checked in and then board their plane by 10. To get to the airport it would have taken Byakuya only about half an hour, his luggage was ready, he only had to get dressed. 

He could have got up at 7 with no rush. 

But he had been up since 5. Byakuya couldn’t sleep, he had never felt that nervous in his whole life and he couldn’t understand why. He kept thinking about how soon he would be leaving for his business trip _with Makoto,_ but time was going by so painfully slow. Truth was, he couldn’t wait. He would have travelled by plane, _sitting next to Makoto;_ he would have stayed at a hotel, _along with Makoto;_ he would have attended the meetings and gone to the dinners, _always along with Makoto._ Most times those event were boring, useless, an excuse to get together with important men and pretend to talk about work, just to then organise bleak dinners where you talked about nothing and everyone showed their true shallowness. Truth was, Byakuya hated most of those men he could have probably called “colleagues”; he found them dull, vile even. Miserable people who had obtained what they had without ever working for it, out of sheer luck or by playing dirty. Byakuya felt different, absolutely not part of that group, an outcast. But that didn’t upset him. Maybe it wasn’t something to be proud of, but he felt like he was better than them. He, at least, had pride in what he did, he was an honest person.

Thinking that Makoto would have to deal with that kind of people and have to interact with them, Byakuya felt sick to his stomach. He was afraid that the other boy would change his mind about him, that their friendship might “crack” because the secretary would start seeing him like a dull, snobbish, and false man. Or, perhaps, it was what the boy had been thinking since the beginning and wasn’t showing it out of fear of the possible consequences. After all, Byakuya was his boss. Despite him seeing Makoto as his equal, in the company’s hierarchy and perhaps in the social one too, the heir hd a higher status than the brunette and he held a certain power. Maybe Makoto was afraid that Byakuya, if upset, could have fired him on the spot. Truth was that the heir had understood he would have never been able to do something like that. He had come to start perceiving a certain despair within himself, something that from the outside couldn’t be seen, but that the felt burdening his soul: he was terrified of not having Makoto in his daily life anymore.Even if Makoto would have showed to hate him, Byakuya would have been so desperate he would have tried to make the boy change his mind and make himself likeable, even just platonically. He hated it, he thought it was a sick behaviour, but he was truly afraid it could happen. Perhaps that was one of the reasons he was so nervous about leaving for the trip; being alone together for sucha long time would have tested both of them. Makoto would have seen sides of Byakuya’s personality that normally wouldn’t have been noticed and vice versa. 

He didn’t have breakfast, he wouldn’t have been able to eat. While in the car, the closer he got to the airport, the more his anxiety grew inside of him, eating him alive. 

But it disappeared, just like that, as soon as he saw Makoto from afar, smiling at him and bringing him back down to Earth, helping him think that, maybe, things wouldn’t have gone that badly.

«This might be stupid, but I’m really excited. I’ve travelled this far very few times, even fewer times byplane.» Makoto was looking around himself with the same expression of a kid in a candy shop.

He was examining everything of the plane, commenting in awe the view, how comfortable the seats were (of course business class seats),the snacks and drinks offered there. It was amusing how excited he’d get about such trivial yet extremely new things (for him). His facial expressions were just as excited when they got to the hotel; despite it not being extremely luxurious, in Makoto’s eyes it was still far more elegant than any other hotel he had ever stayed at. 

Their rooms were at the seventh floor, number sixteen for Makoto and eighteen for Byakuya, 

«You have all afternoon to rest. Come knock on my door around 6, we’ll go to the little happy hour my other…colleagues organised as a welcome for everyone. If you need me, you know where to find me.»

«Alright. You should rest too, you seem exhausted. You lookedbit worried earlier, you know? I don’t know if something’s bothering you, but if you need help, I’m ready to listen to you.» Makoto offered him a sincere smile, before waving him goodbye and going to his own room.

_Yes, something is bothering me, but I can’t tell you, not now._

Byakuya sighed, cursing himself for letting his discomfort show to the point of worrying or making makoto suspicious. He eventually decided it was best to sleep it off. After changing himself he set an alarm on his phone before laying down on the comfortable bed and falling asleep almost immediately, exhausted. 


	6. Five

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Byakuya accepts it's ok to smile

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for the short and not-so-eventful chapter TwT I promise that next week's one is going to be more eventful, I'll make it up to you

Byakuya didn’t dream often and when he did, his dreams were never clear or coherent. That day he did dream, but all he could hear was a voice in the distance, a vague feeling of warmth and comfort. He couldn’t make out what the voice was saying to him, but he felt solace. He saw a figure coming closer to him. It was blurry, he couldn’t make out its features and couldn’t recognise it, but he could see one clear detail: its cheeks sprayed with freckles. Now Byakuya understood who was in front of him in his dream and felt a strong sense of peace mixed to the desire of getting closer to the figure, a figure that was so close yet too far for him to touch it. He was getting closer, he had almost been able to hold that creature that was so familiar to him, but he was abruptly woken up by his own alarm ringing, just doing its job. Byakuya laid still on his bed, trying to understand what had just happened. When he was completely conscious again he realised he was clutching the bedsheets to his chest, as if he had tried to hug someone in his sleep. He threw it to the side with an annoyed huff, quickly getting up and deciding it was time to take a shower. When he had finally washed himself and got dressed he felt a lot better; going back to sit on his bed to check if he had received any messages. There was one coming from Touko, trying to cheer him on. Byakuya didn’t know wether to feel embarrassed or not.

“Have fun with Makoto~ I’ll pray for the perfect opportunity to force you guys to share the same room, instead of being separated~ Make the best out of this trip~”

He opted for a short “Thank you, I will keep you updated”, before throwing his phone to the side, sighing. Luckily, he soon would have been able to drown his worries in a drink or two; not enough to seem unrefined and get carried away, but enough to relax his nerves. 

Makoto’s knock on the door brought him back to reality. When Byakuya went to open to him, the other boy was there waiting for him, with his usual and reassuring smile. Despite not being super close to each other, Byakuya could smell Makoto’s scent, the mix of his usual pine-scented body wash and a hint of cologne, not enough to be sickening, but enough to be felt. His hair was messy as usual, they always seemed to have a life of their own, but it was clear that the brunette had tried combing and shaping it. Byakuya had reassured him that the evening would have been completely informal (he already knew a lot of his colleagues would have showed up in the same outfits as if they were on vacation with their families; it would have been a runway of hawaiian shirts), but Makoto had still found a way to seem semi-formal: he was wearing a dark-green, slim t-shirt tucked in a pair of high waisted black pants. Byakuya was no different though, wearing his signature dark pants and a white, long sleeved button up. He smiled a little and the two headed together to the event.

«Okay, now that we’re alone and they can’t hear us, can I be honest?» Byakuya turned around to look at Makoto, his interest piqued by the question.

«Wow, they all seemed so dumb…no offence! I mean, maybe they’re your friends, it’s just-» Makoto couldn’t finish his sentence, stopping at the sight of Byakuya trying to hold back a laugh, caught off guard as he wasn’t expecting such comments from his secretary.

«Yes, they are actually quite dumb. I always found them rather hollow and sad, it’s nice to have a second opinion.» He observed with a smile. 

«They’re so… empty headed. All they know how to do is laugh awkwardly at their own jokes or talk about absolutely nothing; half the time I wasn’t even listening and was lost in my thoughts.» Makoto admitted this with an embarrassed smile. 

«I always pretended to listen too, most of the time. I actually was afraid you might have thought that, deep down, I was just like those men. You might think it’s silly, but I care about your opinion and it would be upsetting if I came off as… someone so superficial.»

It was the first time Byakuya talked about his feelings so freely and with such honesty with Makoto and he regret it right away. At first the boy kept quiet, but he soon smiled back at the heir, as if to calm him down.

«I think I understand your fear a bit, considering the kind of world you’re immersed in I think it’s normal to fear to be labelled as “hollow” or “superficial”, but I never, not even for a moment, thought you were such things. I actually think you’re a deep person and with many things to say, but since you’re very reserved you keep everything to yourself. But I’m really happy you opened up to me like this today, so thank you for talking to me about your worries; it means you trust me.»

It was almost scary for Byakuya to see how Makoto had completely understood what was up, but he also felt relieved; a huge weight had been lifted from his chest. They kept talking for a long time, even once they had already arrived to their rooms. After a while they finally bid each other goodnight, choosing to meet in front of Byakuya’s room the following morning before going to have breakfast. 

Once inside his room, Byakuya went to the bathroom to start getting ready to sleep and, looking in the mirror, he found his reflection smiling at him. It was a small smile, but it was sincere. It was the first time in years that the boy could see his own smile; he had forgotten what his face looked like when that happened. In the past, he would have stopped himself from smiling, trying to hide his emotions to appear cold and stoic again. But not that evening. He had a valid reason to smile, he could let himself indulge in that.

After all, smiling wasn’t that bad, if it was for Makoto. 


	7. Six

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And they were roommates

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh my God they were roommates

«What do you mean with “my a/c doesn’t work”? Why didn’t you tell me last night, you could have come to knock at my door.» Makoto tried to calm Byakuya down, insisting that it was no big deal and that to get through the night without overheating, sleeping in his underwear had been enough. But the heir didn’t want to hear it. They were in a normally pretty warm area and, on top of that, it was the warmest season. Without even just a bit of a/c, it was quite hard to sleep comfortably and Byakuya didn’t want Makoto to go through the whole trip sleeping awfully due to the heat.

«I understand what you’re saying, but I don’t want to ask for another room, I’d feel guilty…plus I doubt there are any available rooms; it’s a busy season, there’s a lot of people around.» Byakuya had to agree with the last statement; in these conditions it would have been hard to find a spare room and waiting until the cooling system was repaired would have taken a while.

Suddenly, Byakuya had an idea, though he was afraid of what Makoto could have thought about it. He tried not to dwell too much on it, considering it was the only solution they had and not only would it have allowed Makoto not to suffer the night heat, but it would have also allowed Byakuya to spend more time with him. Touko would have been very happy with that kind of development, the heir could imagine her rejoicing. Perhaps it was her fault if the cooling system had broken, after all she did say she would have been keeping her fingers crossed.

«Would you like to share the room with me? Perhaps it’s not the most ideal solution, but at least you won’t be overheating. You can use your own room as a “closet” to keep your things and go back and forth when you need something.» He could feel his face burning, but Byakuya prayed that nothing that might alarm or make Makoto suspicious could be seen from the outside

«Are you really sure it wouldn’t bother you sharing your bed with me? I mean…I don’t want to accidentally invade your space more than necessary.»

«I am sure. You don’t have to accept my offer, but if that’s what is worrying you there’s no need to think about it, it’s really no problem for me.»

He did have a few problems, actually. And those problems were Touko’s messages about the whole situation.

“DID YOU REALLY ASK HIM THAT?”

“DID HE REALLY SAY YES?”

“BOTH OF YOU SURPRISE ME”

“BYAKUYA YOU ABSOLUTELY NEED TO MAKE A MOVE, YOU NEED TO DO SOMETHING”

“IT’S NOW OR NEVER BYAKUYA”

He was tempted to block her for a few hours, just to let things calm down, but he knew Touko would have found a way to get to him through other channels.

“The answer is yes to both questions. I don’t know what you mean by ‘make a move’, but I won’t do anything that might make Makoto uncomfortable or ruin our friendship. I’ll keep you updated.”

Byakuya thought about those messages through the whole meeting that morning, unable to focus on anything that was being discussed. It wasn’t important, anyway. “Make a move”. What did Touko mean by that? What would have been the right “move” to make towards Makoto? He would have liked to first understand what kind of feelings had the other boy towards him. Makoto was kind and polite with everyone, what made Byakuya special? They didn’t have anything to do that afternoon, same went for that evening and despite a few of the other businessmen had thought about going out for dinner, Byakuya had politely declined their invitation, opting to stay in their room.

«There’s a pool here…I wanted to go have a swim, do you want to come too? Or would you rather stay here?» Byakuya thought about it. He wasn’t that much of a swimmer and, anyway, Makoto was going to the pool to _work out_ more or less. He would have been too busy to converse or anything.

«Thank you, but I have a few papers I need to take care of. I think it’s best if I stay here.»

«Alright. Do you want to ask room service to bring us dinner? We could watch a movie on Netflix.» It was almost imperceptible, bur Makoto’s voice had a hint of hopefulness in it. Byakuya turned around to smile at him, happy about the idea.

«Yes, I’d like that.»

Once he was alone in the room he put a hand in his hair. He had wasted a perfect chance; even if Makoto was going to the pool to exercise they would have still been able to talk a bit. Maybe instead of working out, Makoto too would have just chilled in the pool with Byakuya, who would have been able to understand what kind of feelings his secretary might have had towards him.

«I am a cretin.»

«A little bit. But he asked you if you could eat dinner in your room, right? And he asked you if you guys could watch a movie. It’s like a domestic date and it’s your chance to impress him.»

Touko’s voice definitely showed a lot of excitement and Byakuya already knew she was plotting something. 

«How? Do you have any suggestions? You seem to be ready to hand out one of your romance novel-style ideas.»

«I have a detailed plan, it’s not just an idea. Listen, you need to make everything romantic. Knowing Makoto he’ll try to order any kind of junk food he sees on the menu, like hamburgers and fries or something that’s absolutely not romantic. Surprise him, order something fancy, make sure it’s already there when he comes back from the pool. And get a bottle of wine. Then, when you’re watching the movie, pretend you’re stretching and wrap your arm around his shoulders, pulling him close to you. He’ll fall to your feet by the end of the evening, trust me on this.»

Byakuya stayed quiet and nodded (although Touko couldn’t see that, so it was kinda pointless), mumbling a “hm-hm” every once in a while, just to make it seem like he was paying attention. Truth be told, Touko’s plan wasn’t convincing him. He didn’t want to be the one controlling the evening and he didn’t think it would be right for him to be the one choosing Makoto’s food. He could have tried the cliché move of pretending to stretch, but at the same time he was afraid of invading the boy’s personal space too much, making him uncomfortable. He was basically back to his starting point, not knowing what to do. Makoto came back about an hour later, his hair still a bit wet, flatter than usual. 

«Do you want to choose what to eat? That way by the time you washed yourself the food will be here.»

«That’s a good idea, yeah.» Makoto smiled, sitting down on the bed close to Byakuya. Very close; their shoulders were touching as the boy looked at the menu the blond was holding in his hands. Byakuya, even through his shirt, could feel how cold the other boy’s skin was, cooled down by the water he had been immersed in for the past few hours. Part of the heir felt the urge to wrap the bedsheets around his shoulders to try and warm the brunette up, but he held himself back. Byakuya looked at the boy go to the bathroom, taking his underwear and pyjamas with him; only after a bit did the blond realise that Makoto had forgotten his shirt on the bed. He didn’t know if it would have been best to tell him, to place it in the bathroom for him to find it or if it was best for him to mind his business and not bother the other boy. He ended up listening to the part of him telling him to leave it alone, but not because he was afraid of making things awkward. His reasons were completely different and selfish. For once in his life, he wanted to allow himself to act that way.


	8. Seven

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Quickie"  
> The gang watches Twilight

When Makoto got out of the bathroom Byakuya was lying on the bed, busy working on his tablet, with his earphones plugged in. He pretended not to see the other, restraining himself from staring too much at the brunette, who had found his shirt again. Despite already having his shorts on, Makoto had come out of the bathroom wrapped up in his bathrobe, perhaps in embarrassment. He turned around with his back facing Byakuya and slipped the robe off, placing it on the bed. The heir tried to shoot a fugacious glance; at least that was the plan. His gaze lingered on the other boy: his skin was rosy, it had more color and life than Byakuya’s milky and pale complexion; his shoulders were sprayed with freckles, just like his cheeks. He was minute, but did not seem frail; his waist was slim, giving his torso a triangle-like shape since his shoulders were broad, but not too much. Byakuya sort of expected him to look like that, after all Makoto was shorter and thinner than him, but he couldn’t stop himself from admiring that slender physique, thinking about what it would have felt like to hold him against his own body. Byakuya snapped his head back, feeling like he was about to start screaming in embarrassment at his own thoughts. 

Luckily, room service saved him from dwelling too much on his embarrassment, knocking at his door.

«I’ll get it!» Makoto came back a few moments later, smiling, holding the tray with the covered up dishes, which were keeping the food warm. Touko had actually been right in her predictions; Makoto had got himself a burger with fries, while Byakuya had opted for a veggie quiche. 

«What’s yours called? Quickie?»

«…No Makoto, no, “quiche”.»

«Oh, right. Yeah, it didn’t feel right.»

_He’s lucky I’m into him._

«What did you want to watch?» Byakuya took out his laptop, going on Netflix and looking at Makoto, who gave him a smile that let the other know he was up to no good.

«Twilight.»

«The vampire one? No, absolutely not.»

«Come on, let’s marathon it, we can sleep in tomorrow anyway. It’ll be fun, I promise you that. Come on, please!» Makoto was begging him while holding back a sly smile.

Byakuya was skeptical, he had always found those movies to be silly. He didn’t want to give in; even though Makoto was involved he was not going to be that weak.

«So you’re telling me he imprinted on the baby. You’re telling me they made a generation of impressionable teenagers watch this. I don’t know how to react. They named her after the Loch Ness monster.» It was two in the morning. They had watched all of the movies. At some point, Makoto had lied against Byakuya and hadn’t moved an inch. The blond couldn’t understand how that position could be comfortable for him.

«Sometimes I still think about it. It’s crazy. But you have to admit it, this was fun, wasn’t it?»

«Alright, I’ll admit it, I thought this would have been worse.» Byakuya stretched, turning off his computer once the movie was over and placing it on his nightstand. Only once the distraction of the movie was out of the picture did the heir truly realise how much he felt Makoto’s presence. The slight pressure applied by the boy’s weight was comforting, just like his warmth. He was close enough for Byakuya to feel engulfed by his scent and only after a while did he realise the brunette had one of his arms wrapped around one of the blond’s, as if it was the most natural thing. The heir felt overloaded, stuck in a tornado of mixed feelings. Part of him longed to hug Makoto and bury hishands in that mop of soft, messy hair, the other part was stopping him, paralysed by the fear of ruining everything and losing any chance to do things right. He stayed still, trying to enjoy that moment as long as it lasted, thankful for the fact that Makoto felt comfortable enough to stay that close to him.

«Byakuya, speaking of teenagers, what were you like when you were younger? I mean, were you an easily impressionable teen too?» The brunette smiled, his eyes lively and curious. They were both lying down, ready to sleep, but still far too awake to do anything. Byakuya turned around to look at him, squinting his eyes in an attempt to focus on the other boy, since he didn’t have his glasses on.

«I can’t say I have changed much, I was pretty mature for my age. You probably would have found me boring.»

«But you surely must have had friends with whom you could spend your free time, right?»

Byakuya thought about it, despite already knowing that his answer was not going to be what Makoto was hoping for. 

«Not really. Touko has always been my only friend and I always spent a lot of time studying and working hard to become worthy of the position I’m in now. I was constantly competing against my siblings and step-siblings. Plus…» He stopped in his tracks as a few unpleasant memories resurfaced. Despite his efforts to lie to himself saying it wasn’t important, that he wasn’t truly hurt and to his efforts hide everything, somethinghad shown on his face. Makoto frowned, reaching out his hand and placing it on the blond’s shoulder, squeezing it lightly, as if to reassure him. Byakuya sighed.

«I didn’t get along with the other students and I’ve often been ridiculed by them. The very few times I tried voluntarily to make friends something always went wrong, so I begun to give up, throwing myself into my studies and my job, where I was awarded with recognition and satisfaction.» Makoto was the only person on this planet wo whom Byakuya would have ever said certain things, sure of the fact that he would have not regret that decision. But it still felt weird to open up like that to another person.

«For what is worth, I would have been happy to be your friend. I cant complain, I had a few great friends, but I wasn’t very popular either…I understand how you might have felt.» He smiled, trying to make Byakuya feel less alone. 

They stayed up for a long time, talking about their past, present and future plans, trusting each other with their feelings and other experiences, getting to know each other better. They slept until late on the following day, with Byakuya being the first one to wake up around lunchtime, with Makoto clinging onto his hand. He couldn’t remember wether they had fallen asleep like tat or if that was something that had happened through the night, all he knew was that he didn’t want to move from there.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a bit fluffier, as promised.
> 
> Please don't come @ me if some stuff about twilight is wrong all I've learned has been through osmosis thanks to my friends who talk about it or memes


	9. Eight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> oops drama

Every day Byakuya was more and more sure that asking Makoto to come with him during that trip had been one of the best ideas he had ever had. Every night they would talk until late while lying in their bed, looking at the ceiling and telling each other stories from their past, anything that came to their mind. During those four days Byakuya had opened up to Makoto more than what he would have ever expected and, despite his initial fears, he didn’t regret it. By then he really trusted the brunette, he wasn’t afraid of being betrayed or anything.

It was their fifth and last day, they would have gone back home the following afternoon.

An important dinner was planned for that evening and Byakuya had a plan. The event would have taken place in a building nearby, with a balcony from which the whole city could be seen. Thanks to Touko, who was friends with Makoto’s sister, Byakuya had discovered that the brunette had a romantic side. Under the writer’s guidance he had decided to try to make his “big move” on that balcony, where they would have been surrounded by a wonderful atmosphere. Byakuya wasn’t sure at first, there was still a high chance of them being interrupted by someone, considering they wouldn’t have been alone; but he eventually agreed, especially considering his determination to do something nice for Makoto. 

He was fairly sure everything would have gone right; or at least that was what he thought observing the other boy’s behaviours: he was affectionate towards the blond, much more than he used to be before the trip. Often, during their late night talks, they would end up holding each other’s hand or, sometimes, Makoto would lay his head close to Byakuya’s shoulder, sometimes using it as a pillow, other times happy to just have his forehead brush against it. Makoto was always the one to initiate certain displays of affection, things that were still a bit of an obstacle for Byakuya. It wasn’t that he didn’t like those things, quite the opposite actually; he just had a hard time making the first move. he was still getting used to it.

«By now I should get used to being around those important people, but thinking about tonight still makes me anxious.» Makoto observed with a nervous laugh, walking out of the bathroom while tucking his shirt into his pants and going into the closet to fetch his jacket. 

_You have no idea how nervous I am right now._ Togami had never felt so stressed in his whole life, he felt his insides twist around and go cold from time to time. Luckily, he was really good at masking it and his face and actions let nothing surface. «After a glass of wine you’ll feel more relaxed.»

«You’re right, or at least I’ll be tipsy enough to not care at all! Ah…I’m joking of course, I don’t want to ruin the evening.» Makoto regret his joke right away, afraid that Byakuya might deem it out of place and unrefined.

«I highly doubt you could ruin it. You would actually make it more interesting.» The blond offered a shy smile to the other boy, who seemed to calm down.

When they got to the event, almost all the other guests were already talking to each other, walking around the room and stopping at the buffet table every once in a while. In front of that table Makoto looked like a little kid, his eyes shining with awe at the sight of so many different and tempting foods. Byakuya didn’t get much for himself, he wasn’t all that hungry, but Makoto ate enough for the both of them, re-filling his plate more than once.

Despite his state of stress, Byakuya was able to enjoy the evening anyway, even if towards the end of the night he lost sight of Makoto because he had been distracted by two of his colleagues who had started asking him various questions. The secretary had gone out on the balcony, leaning against the railing to get a breath of fresh air and admire the view, happy about the evening.

«What are you doing out here all alone?» Makoto turned around to see a beautiful woman with black hair tied in a bun looking at him. She was just a bit taller than him and walked closer with a smile; he knew she was one of Byakuya’s “colleagues”. He had already talked to her before that evening; even on the previous occasions it had been the woman going up to talk to him first. He knew her name was Kotori, she had insisted he avoided being too formal and instead used her first name. Now that he thought of it, she had come up to talk to him every time she could and every time he as if she was staring at him in an odd way. He never had a good feeling when she was around. 

«I was getting some fresh air, it’s a wonderful evening after all so it’s nice outside.»

«I agree, the view from here is wonderful. Do you mind if I stay here with you a bit?» 

Byakuya had lost track of the time; every time he was done speaking to someone and tried to go look for Makoto, someone else would stop him. For the sake of decency, he was forced to carry on the conversation for a bit. This went on for almost an hour, much to his annoyance. When he finally freed himself from any nuisance, he walked out on the balcony, after understanding that Makoto was not inside. He saw the brunette’s mop of hair peek from behind a vase with a plant, covering the rest of the boy’s body and the bench he was sitting on. Byakuya stepped closer but ended up seeing something he would have rather avoided seeing: one of his colleagues had her arm wrapped around Makoto’s waist, while she stroked his cheek with her other hand. Byakuya couldn’t see the brunette’s facial expression, but he was blinded by both jealousy and disappointment to care. It was the first time in his life he felt so betrayed.

Makoto and the other woman had talked for a long time; every so often she would stroke his hand or knee. He stayed still, not really knowing how to react and feeling rather uncomfortable. He was hoping that by being cold and detached she would have given up. Unlucky for him, that wasn’t the case. 

«You’re a lot cuter than those other silly men, you know?» Kotori gave Makoto what should have been a reassuring smile, but he only felt like some sort of prey. He felt her eyes piercing him and he slightly scooted back, trying to be discreet about it.

«Oh, really? Well, thank you uhm…you’re really pretty too» He wanted to find a good excuse to leave, but he was far too nice to leave her just like that. 

«I’m glad you think that. You know, you always seem so tense, you should try to relax a bit more.»

«Tense? I don’t feel tense, actually, this business trip is pretty…fu…n?»

Before he could finish his sentence, the woman wrapped herself around him, her hand inching closer to Makoto’s face, way too close. 

«That’s true, but you don’t need to worry. I can help you relax a bit, if you want.» That was way too much even for someone as nice as Makoto, now extremely uncomfortable and appalled. He placed one hand on her shoulder to try and push her away, but just as he was opening his mouth to ask her to leave him alone, a voice he knew very well interrupted him. 

«I’m sorry, I see you’re busy. I’ll wait for you at the hotel.» He quickly turned around, just in time to see Byakuya turn away and walk off. He had always been a cold and sharp person, in his way of speaking, but his voice had never been so full of venom before then. Makoto felt his whole body freeze. He pushed off the woman without much care before running off to chase the blond, clinging to his sleeve to try and stop him, terrified at the thought of Byakuya being mad at him.


	10. Nine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> They talk their feelings out and communicate which is my k*nk

«Byakuya, listen, I can explain-»

«There’s no need to do that, really. Please, go back to Kotori, it’s quite rude to leave a lady alone like that.»

«No, you don’t understand.»

«What do I not understand? I can tell you what I don’t understand: you. I don’t understand your behaviours. For a second I was bold enough to dare thinking that certain things you did, certain mannerisms of yours were things you only ever did with me and I deemed myself very lucky. Now I understand they weren’t anything special. No, I don’t want to listen to you right now, really, it’s fine. Go back to Kotori, I’ll be heading back to the hotel, I’m quite tired. Oh, and if you’re afraid of repercussions of any kind and of me abusing my power to get back to you, don’t worry, I’ma honest person. I know not to dwell on these petty things, despite people believing otherwise.»

Byakuya’s voice was ice cold, harsh; he didn’t leave Makoto room to try and explain what was going on. He didn’t want to listen to his justifications, he didn’t care. In the end, it was fine if things had gone like that; he had been stupid, hoping that something had bloomed between them, or that could bloom in the future. Before going away, the blond looked at Makoto one last time and he could swear he had seen something shatter in the other boy’s eyes. But Byakuya was stubborn and didn’t falter, leaving the event and walking back to the hotel on his own. Once he was back in his room he decided to go take a shower, a desperate attempt to calm himself down, but it didn’t work. He kept thinking about the broken expression Makoto had before he left the room, and asked himself if he hadn’t been the one at fault. He wanted to be the bigger person, leaving Makoto with the woman and not sticking his nose into their business, pretending he didn’t care; but all he ended up doing was looking like a kid throwing a tantrum who refuses to listen to others. He was hoping Makoto would return to their room as soon as possible, so that they could talk about it, but it had been an hour already and he was nowhere to be seen. He texted him, trying to remain calm and avoid showing too much worry.

[Byakuya] I would like to talk to you as soon as possible. Please come back to our room. I’ll be waiting for you.

After fifteen minutes he still had no reply, but the other boy had seen the message.

[Byakuya] I know you saw my message. Please respond as soon as you can. 

That message too was seen but received no reply. Every twenty minutes or so, Byakuya would text him again, his worry growing stronger and more overwhelming. Why wasn’t Makoto replying? It had almost been two hours and a half, did something happen to him? Did he feel sick? Or was he so mad that he refused to reply?

Byakuya kept pacing back and forth around the room, restless and anxious. If something had happened to Makoto he would have never forgiven himself, not after their argument. He felt as if he was going mad, he wanted to get out the room and go look for the other boy. He was about to send another message, when he heard the door slowly open. His head shot up, staring at the door from which Makoto was entering the room, his head low. Byakuya rushed towards him, but the other boy raised his hands, as if to stop him. When the secretary finally raised his head, the blond saw his pained expression: his eyes were wet and red, just like his cheeks. Standing close to him, Byakuya could smell the scent of alcohol coming off of him. He had never seen Makoto as the kind of person who got drunk when things weren’t going well, but perhaps this was an exception.

«Listen…I know seeing me get here in this state is a bit gross. _I_ think I’m gross.» Makoto closed the door behind himself, leaning with his back against it and raising his head to look at Byakuya.

«And I know what you saw could have seemed…very equivocal, I won’t deny it. But it wasn’t my fault, you’ve got to believe me! It’s…it’s just she started everything and I wasn’t quick enough to act and I didn’t know how to react to not seem too rude, but to stop her at the same time and…I don’t act like I do with you with everyone! What I do with you I do it because…I care about you, okay? But maybe now I ruined everything, I mean you’re mad and you have every right to be and…and…»

Byakuya stopped him, since he looked on the verge of tears.

«Makoto, please breathe, everything’s alright.»

«No, that’s not true. I’m hammered and I look ridiculous, it’s just I was nervous and I was afraid of coming back to our room right away and I wanted to give you your space and-» Byakuya stopped him, placing a hand on his shoulder and squeezing lightly, to try and attract his attention. 

«Makoto, I’m being honest. I’m not mad at you, I have no valid reason to be. Rather, I’m mad at myself for behaving like a true idiot. I should have let you talk and listen to your version of the story, rather than being stubborn and staying in my dumb convictions.It’s alright.» Byakuya’s voice had never been so calm and understanding, the secretary almost didn’t expect that. Makoto looked him in the eyes, while the blond smiled at him, trying to get the other to understand that it was all in the past, that everything was alright. 

«Can we…forget this evening? I want to go back to how things were before…» Makoto murmured the last part of his sentence, lowering his gaze as if he had said some profanity he was ashamed of. As if to better explain himself, he moved his hand on top of Byakuya’s, still placed on his should er and squeezed it lightly, bringing it up to his cheek. The heir understood. 

«Do you need a hand getting ready for bed? You need to sleep, you look trashed.» Byakuya’s voice had a tint of playfulness in it as he was trying to make the whole atmosphere lighter.

«I think I can do it by myself. I mean, I doubt I’m that hammered I can’t get changed, come on.» He chuckled, sitting down on the bed and starting to undress himself, although with a bit of difficulty. His movements were uncoordinated and he was having a hard time undoing his buttons. After a few failed attempts he raised his gaze towards Byakuya, with the same expression a puppy would have. He was too embarrassed to speak up, ashamed of himself for being in such state in front of the blond. The heir didn’t think too much of it though, he didn’t care. He and Makoto had talked it out, everything was alright; he wouldn’t have changed his opinion regarding the other for something like that. He sat down on the bed, next to the brunette and began to undo his shirt, starting from the top; but as soon as he got to the second button, he felt Makoto tense up and the boy suddenly grabbed his wrist. 

«There’s…there’s something I didn’t tell you…I was going to do it sooner or later, I just didn’t know when it would have been best…please, please promise me you won’t change your opinion of me…»


	11. Ten

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is my fanfic and I decide the self indulgence

Byakuya couldn’t understand what could have triggered such reaction. What could be so “bad” to make Makoto so nervous all of a sudden? A tattoo? A physical defect? The more he thought about it, the more every possibility did not seem enough to explain such behaviour, especially considering Byakuya wouldn’t have judged him for such things.

«I don’t know what you could be hiding under your shirt to make you so nervous, I highly doubt it could be something capable of making me change my mind about you. I promise I won’t judge you, whatever it is. If you prefer, I can let you try undressing on your own again, i don’t want to force you to do anything you’re not ready for.» 

Makoto bit his lower lip, staying still for a bit, but eventually letting Byakuya’s wrist go, turning his face away and giving Byakuya space to continue.

«I trust you. I think it’s time you know, anyway.»

Byakuya kept undoing the buttons, until he could slip the shirt off of Makoto’s shoulders and finally see what was bothering him: he had two thin, long scars on his chest, under his pectorals. 

«Is this what was worrying you? Scars from a surgery? I know they might make you insecure, but I see no reason to be ashamed of them. They’re the proof you were able to overcome an illness, aren’t they?»

«No… I didn’t actually “overcome” any illness.» Makoto had a wobbly smile; he didn’t know wether to be even more worried or relieved seeing Byakuya so apparently calm. 

«Then I really don’t understand.»

Makoto sighed before speaking.

«Well, I think you know what it means to be transgender…well, I am. Those are the scars I have left from top surgery… I trust you, I was just nervous about telling you because…I feared you might treat me differently.»

Byakuya stayed silent, listening to the other. He couldn’t find a single reason to change the way he behaved towards Makoto, even after finding out this aspect of him.

«I understand your fears, I am happy you talked about it with me, I know it mustn’t have been easy. But I really find no reason to treat you differently after this…confession. You’re Makoto Naegi, you’re still the boy I know and that I’ve grown fond of; your gender identity, wether you’re transgender or cis, will not affect your personality or the other things that made me get close to you. You will need much more to make me change my mind about you. »

Byakuya wasn’t that good when it came to feelings, he wasn’t used to cheering people up. He was able to do that with Touko, but only because they had been friends for years and he had learnt and understood what the girl needed and on which occasions; he was still learning that with Makoto. He didn’t know wether what he had said could actually help the other feel better or not, but he was hoping it would. 

Makoto had avoided looking at Byakuya the whole time, always facing the wall, unable to sustain the blond’s gaze, but when he finished talking, the brunette found the strength to turn around again. His eyes were wet again and, for a second, Byakuya felt a sharp pain, almost going into full panic. Had he got everything wrong? Perhaps he had said something upsetting without realising, he had never been in such a situation, he was afraid he had only made Makoto feel worse. 

But then Makoto smiled. A shy smile, but it was genuine and relieved and it was an attempt to hold back a happy sob. 

«Thank you…I really mean it.»

Byakuya felt the weight on his chest lift immediately, allowing him to breathe again. The blond looked at Makoto in the eyes for a few moments, before following his instinct and kissing him, sneaking a hand to the back of the boy’s head to pull him as close as he could. It was short, unsure, but perfect for the both of them. Byakuya could taste the faint drops of alcohol on Makoto’s lips, mixed to the tears he had just finished pouring. That was not how he imagined his first kiss would go, but he didn’t care; he wouldn’t have wanted to have it any other way. Once they parted, they rested their foreheads one against the other, while Byakuya slowly stroked Makoto’s cheek, looking at his freckles.

«Maybe I should finish helping you, we’re getting distracted quite a lot.»

«Maybe you’re right, but admit it, you enjoyed this.»

Makoto giggled, showing off that smile that Byakuya loved so much. 

«Can I ask you a question? I hope I won’t come off as too indiscreet.» Byakuya was looking at Makoto who was finally in his pyjamas; he had just washed his teeth and was coming out of the bathroom. 

«Mh? Yeah, what kind?» 

«Do you need to follow a hormonal therapy too? I know that’s how it usually works, although of course it’s not for every single person. I was just thinking it’s…funny how this hasn’t come up sooner, considering we’ve lived so close for a whole week.» Byakuya observed, genuinely curious. Perhaps Makoto took his quantity less often? Or perhaps he had interrupted his therapy for a bit? Makoto’s eyes widened and the heir feared he might have screwed up, but as soon as he tried to apologise, the other stopped him.

«No, no, your question didn’t make me uncomfortable, actually…it reminded me I forgot to take my shot today. I completely forgot about it.» Makoto burst out laughing, much to Byakuya’s confusion. 

«I was so busy thinking about tonight I forgot, I feel so dumb. I can take it now, to fix it up.»

«No offence, but do you really think it’s a good idea to take your shot now? I don’t want you to get hurt.»

Makoto agreed that, indeed, handling a needle while drunk wasn’t the best of ideas. In the end, Byakuya took care of that too, under Makoto’s guidance to make sure he wouldn’t accidentally hurt the boy. 

«Hey…thank you.» The heir turned around, shifting in his bed to look at Makoto in the face, who was lying next to him and was stroking the hand he was holding hostage. 

«For what?»

«Well…basically everything. Tonight was…weird. But I’m happy.»

«I’m the one who should thank you. Starting from when I hired you and you started bringing me coffee every morning; I truly appreciated it even if I didn’t really show it.»

Makoto smiled, wriggling closer to Byakuya to kiss him, letting him know that despite his initial, cold front, the boy had been able to see through the heir and understand his true nature. Perhaps that was another reason why Byakuya trusted Makoto so much: because he knew that the other could understand him, maybe better than anyone else; and that was really what he needed in life. 


	12. Epilogue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, we're at the end of this journey. Thank you to everyone who's stick around, I hope you enjoyed this as much as I enjoyed writing it!

The following day Makoto woke up with a hangover, refusing to get out of the bed. Unable to convince him, Byakuya agreed to ask room service to bring them breakfast, hoping it would help the other feel better, at least enough to finish packing up their luggage and get on the plane where he would have been able to nap for a bit. 

«Admit it, you must have never had this much fun during a business trip! You probably never had to take care of a drunk travel companion, that’s for sure.» Despite looking like a complete wreck and being visibly exhausted, Makoto still found the energy to joke around and smile. Despite having known him for a while now, Byakuya still found it amazing. 

«I think I never had this much fun on pleasure trips either. It was fun; you’ll come with me on the next one too. I won’t accept “no” for an answer, I hope that’s clear.»

«Will we get a room together?» Makoto’s voice was quieter; he was trying to hide a sly smile. Byakuya rolled his eyes, unable to hold back a smile himself.

«I presume we will be getting a room together, yes.»

Makoto leaned back again against his seat, turning to face the window. Byakuya went back to look at his tablet, going back to work on his stuff with the intent to leave the brunette alone and allow him to rest during the flight, jumping a bit in surprise when he felt Makoto’s hand sneak to intertwine itself with the blond’s hand, gently. The secretary didn’t turn around, but Byakuya knew him well enough to be sure that he was smiling, satisfied with himself. 

«Can you stay with me while I wait for a taxi?» Makoto had been finally able to take back his luggage after a long wait, while Byakuya had been lucky enough his stuff had been one of the first bags to come out. 

«Of course, no problem, but…I had an idea, but maybe you’ll think it’s inappropriate.»

Makoto raised his gaze towards the heir, wondering what kind of idea could be so “inappropriate”, especially if it was someone like Byakuya who had come up with it. 

«I’m all ears.»

«Would you like to come home with me? We could…marathon some movies together; we don’t have work tomorrow, so that wouldn’t be an issue. And I can personally drive you home tomorrow morning. Of course if your parents don’t mind you sleeping out tonight too, they probably want to see you again.» Despite Byakuya’s tone of voice being composed and calm as usual, he was avoiding looking Makoto in the eyes, as if he had just said something obscene. Makoto couldn’t help but find Byakuya’s sudden embarrassment endearing, considering how serious and stoic he always was. 

«I think my parents will understand; I’d love to come home with you, but…on one condition.»

Byakuya looked at him again, curious and waiting to hear Makoto’s “condition”.

«I choose the movies. Have you ever watched “High School Musical”? Byakuya sighed, rolling his eyes as he smiled in relief.

«Okay, fine, I accept your condition. I hope it will be as fun as last time, otherwise I’m never letting you choose a movie again.»

«I know you would never do that, you love my choices when it comes to this stuff.»

_Maybe. Or maybe I just like to see you laugh. One day I’ll say it to you out loud, but for now I just want to enjoy these little moments with you._


End file.
